Zombie-con kicks off the NYC Halloween season with a bloodstained romp through manhattan. Its an afternoon of debauchery, makeup, making out, and eating brains. most of the brain eating is done by the toxic quantities of liquor we zombies consume while lumbering through streets, parks and bars.
this was my first zombie-con, but I joined up with my crew of seasoned professionals. Chris and Kim, Gaylen and Santa, Colin and Aubrey, and the two third wheels, me and Jamie. Rachael, organizer of epic bike camping weekends, could not be persuaded to join us for the opening ceremonies.
I rode over the WBB and arrived at Jamie’s apartment around noon. she had a solid kit of zombie paraphernalia splayed over the table, and we zombied up in our best “iBanker zombie” effort.
We weren’t sure if bikes or subway was the way to go, but as usual, we straddled the bikes and set off. we rode 50 blocks from from chinatown to grand central, but no one seemed to think we were out of place. apparently it takes more than two well dressed zombies on bikes to irk a New Yorker.
We arrived at the bar on 33rd st and locked up. There were some fellow undead loitering, smoking, and handing out fake money. Inside the bar we found the crew sitting in back sipping on bloody mary’s.
There were some extra props floating around, and Gaylen handed me a dismembered foot. I wasn’t sure what to do with it, so i did what i always do when i don’t know what to do… i stuck it down my pants. the severed ankle stump protruding from my fly.
catfish zombie. photo by Kim
i spent most of the morning getting drunk, and most of the afternoon with a zombie johnson hanging out from my trousers.
When we got down near the Astor cube, we staggered into a bar with drink specials… 5 shots for $10. and we partook. maybe an hour into the partaking, Rachael showed up. the prodigal son had returned, and we needed to celebrate and slaughter a bull in her honor.
we immediately hoisted her into a crowdsurf, and commenced the celebration. zombiecon was complete.
the dance party was epic, and by 3 in the afternoon, someone said it was time to find fresh brains to feast upon. Back on the Train and down to Wall St. We zombied over to the Charging Bull Statue and prepared it for the sacrifice. 12 zombies climbed on board, and two more started getting it on near his balls. I don’t know how this went unnoticed by the police, but we raged without incident.
photo by suckapants
by 5 we were a bit zombied out and started home. I had to ride the train back up to 33 st to pick up my bike. Luckily RB-1 Kenobi was still locked up in place. Someone removed the plastic bag that covered my saddle, but left the saddle, fender and blinky in place. sweet
